Grateful for the Present

IMG_3251

Ten days into a new year… ten days in and I feel like life is moving along so swiftly… and I don’t really have time to live in the past anymore…

And I think the truth in not living in the past becomes more real everyday… almost like I feel as if I am wasting time by going back to the past to think about memories or to feel some kind of guilt, jealousy or even self-hatred… It’s all become so ridiculous…

And I feel like in this moment… this particular one in general… well… once again I am learning so much… and I feel like it’s true… that I’ll look back on this time… this time where I got to become me… that I’ll look back and realize I was growing faster than I even realized or imagined… and that life was taking me on this amazing journey… and that God was guiding me right along… and that he continued to surprise me and just give…

And sometimes it seems difficult to continue to live in the moment… and love the moment I am living in…

To me… well… to me it’s much simpler to plan and create what might happen next… then I can control what my life will become… and nothing will sneak up on me… but I’ve learned that I like the surprise… the sneak attacks and not knowing what card I’ll be dealt next…

And it’s taken me so long to come to this place…

But today… well today I am just grateful… grateful that I can continue to look around me in amazement… that everything I see on the west coast is so spectacular and beautiful… it’s designed in such a way that I feel like speechless…

And I’ve never been good at being grateful… but it’s something that I’m striving towards… because I am learning… that in the midst of moving towards what I want… which is my own family one day… well life is giving me so much along the way…

And if I can’t stop and smell the roses on my journey to that destination… well then I’ll miss out on the goodness God has provided me with right now… and I can only enjoy all of this right now.. because it is after all in the present…

So saying this… well it encourages me to continue to just live…

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s