Embrace the Interest…

IMG_2368It was mentioned in conversation the other day that finding friends requires you to know what interests you… That it basically should be easy if you know what you enjoy….

Right now… Well I feel and know deep down that this is a true statement for me… And I feel like the only thing that stands in the way of knowing my interests is fear…

And while that sounds a little crazy… I mean why would I willingly fear something that I enjoy?… Well I do…

And I fear it because for years I feel like I’ve been told what interests me… And then for a while I was interested in what others around me were interested in because I thought that would gain a friendship… Just “like what they like”….

But I can see so clearly now that that type of thinking wasn’t good at all… Because it’s led me to a place of confusion…. A place where I’ve had to discover for myself… By myself… What I actually enjoy and like…

And in the midst of it I go back and forth… Thinking “gosh you’re boring for liking that”… But then… Well then I guess that’s individuality…

And Lord knows I’m not good at being an individual… At being myself… Because it requires me to stand alone and face possible rejection… Which I’ve always struggled with some…

But right now… Well right now I feel basically inspired and motivated to continue embrace the things that interest me… Because within that, I think my entire world will open up a little bit more and I’ll really be able to just be me… To just live from this place of peace that I’ve cultivated…

And hopefully I’ll find friendships… And hopefully I’ll move forward into greater things for my life… And hopefully I’ll be able to inspire and motivate others to do the same…

But for now… Well for now I think it’s good to just embrace what I like and what I love… One interest at a time…

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