Ok, now what?…

Feeling confused is one of my least favorite things about the journey of life… Feeling depressed is equally awful… Feeling purposeless, well it simply adds to the way in which I feel in this moment…

Those close to me might say I’m an extreme personality… Very passionate about God and the things that surround God… So when I can’t find Him… Or when He feels very still, not really saying much… Well that’s when I just become really confused and depressed on the inside… Almost feeling a sense of purposelessness…

Because I just need and want to learn more about Him… I just need and want to grow closer to Him… To gain more of what it means to be alive… To live this life to the very fullest…

And recently, the Holy Spirit has had me on a journey… Helping me discover where my identity is found… Helping me dismantle the shaken areas of my foundation that I was finding security and confidence in…

And in the midst, well I’ve found my identity… I’ve discovered that it’s in the intangibleness of God… In the intangibleness of the things of God… But now what?… And why do I feel like this?… And how long will I feel this way?…

Maybe a lot of it has to do with transition… It seems as though this entire year has been one of transition… And with the transition, with the movement of core parts of me… Well I just kind of feel lost… Even though deep down I believe that I’m more secure and confident than ever before…

So… Then, well how do I sort through it all?… How do I come to a place of peace within this season?… To just live confidently and securely with the identity I now am sure I have?…

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