Last night I found myself in the midst of deep internal conflict. Why? Well, I was wrestling with God’s will verses my will… this happens frequently.
Well, in the middle of expressing my internal struggle my sister just happened to be watching “The Crown” on Netflix. All of a sudden she said, “Shhhh! Listen to what she (the lead characters grandmother) is saying. I think it will help you.”
So I got quiet and listened. And here’s what she said:
“I have seen three great monarchies brought down through their failure to separate personal indulgences from duty. You must not allow yourself to make similar mistakes. And while you mourn your father, you must also mourn someone else. Elizabeth Mountbatten. For she has now been replaced with another person, Elizabeth Regina. The two Elizabeths will frequently be in conflict with one another. The fact is, the crown must win. It must always win.”
You see after I heard that statement, I just kind of sat back and breathed…. Because I understood, yet again, what I should do.
I believe when we come into the Kingdom of God we are asked to leave our old self at the door and place a crown of royalty upon our head. And because we wear this crown we must represent everything it stands for.
And I’m not going to lie, it’s a challenge to continue to allow the crown to win. Because as we do we let go of more of our selfishness, self-centeredness and human desire to live the life we want verses the life He wants for us.
And I get it, not everyone is going to surrender their entire self to the plans, purposes and desires of God… But I am. And I hope to continue to do it to such a level that others will eventually follow…. That they’ll follow me as I follow God into His Kingdom.