For about a week now I’ve been painstakingly toiling with the foundational principles of grace and faith. In the midst of the frenzy, I found myself needing answers and a solution, so I sat down with Holy Spirit and He began to unpack things for me.
As He unpacked the contents, I definitely felt better. I could feel my entire being coming to a place of peace and ease as He expressed the importance of being here… not there.
However, when Friday night came, I still felt that there was more. I needed the next piece of the puzzle I was putting together.
On Saturday morning, I woke up to a message from a friend asking if I had checked to see if maybe there was a principality in the way of another breakthrough I am moving towards. When I saw the message, my insides immediately thought, “Oh gosh…. It’s always one more thing… I know for certain my friend is trying to help, but why does it always feel like one more thing?!?! One more thing I am doing wrong. One more thing I haven’t done right… Always something else.”
Feeling somewhat overwhelmed, I sat down to process my thoughts to my sister and my friend. They listened and I talked and talked, pulling what I knew, what I understood and revelation Holy Spirit has shared with me about grace and faith to the surface.
As I mulled over all of my thoughts and beliefs, I started to feel that I was close to a solution. I just needed to reach out, grasp it and pull it into my heart.
So, I walked to the store, still processing… On the walk, I said, “Father, what do I do about all of these thoughts? How do I move forward in this moment?” He said, “Go to the mercy court, repent for your misunderstanding of grace and faith, repent for your blood thoughts and ask for the realm of the blood of Jesus to be applied.” So, I came home and did what He said.
It wasn’t long after I prayed that I began to realize my block… My human spirit understands that I need grace every single day. She understands that it’s by grace that my spirit is able to access the realm of Heaven through faith. She gets it so well that she’s been able to communicate it to my soul very well. However, there is a constant stream of thought inside of me that’s caused me to believe that grace and faith contradict one another. The stream of thought says, “It doesn’t matter how many things you do, it’s never enough the get there.”
You see I follow and follow and follow. I submit to Holy Spirit and follow His lead more times than my soul is comfortable with, but when I stand back, I feel this giant nag in me that says, “We’ve come this far and we still aren’t there! We haven’t done enough to reach the goal! When will we reach the goal? I am tired of striving to feel like I still haven’t done enough.” These thoughts have been very repetitive in my head and heart for years.
Now, my spirit knows grace and faith do not contradict one another. My spirit understands that they are interdependent on one another because they work together in unison as foundational pillars of the realm of the kingdom; however, something inside of me screams at me and tells me they contradict one another. Actually, the screaming is so loud that my head and my heart get caught in a tailspin and I boil over into frustration and anger, leaving me in a puddle of tears on the floor. My soul questions, “Why do I have to do one more thing for ‘this’ to work?! Haven’t I done enough!? Doesn’t grace state that I am more than enough because of my right standing through Jesus?! Why isn’t grace, who is supposed to be more enough, enough?” Then my spirit and Holy Spirit come back and say, “Grace is more than enough.” But then I consider faith…
To me, faith is a lifestyle. It’s a constant and consistent stepping out into the next thing Holy Spirit is bringing forward. It’s following the next direction He’s leading me into with full and complete submission. In so many ways, faith is challenging work because most of the time we are stepping into a reality that only our spirit can perceive. The soul can’t perceive what the spirit realm is asking, so we must boldly move forward in the reality of the supernatural…. We must move forward with what we are hearing Holy Spirit say and then watch as what we are believing for begins to manifest into this 3D, earth realm reality.
And I am 100% good with following through in faith; however, my soul always asks this question, “How can grace be more than enough when I have to do more work through faith?” It seems that I am missing something. Or it seems that there is a glass ceiling preventing me from moving peacefully forward in faith.”
Which leads me into frustration because I don’t want to do one more thing. Doing one more thing makes my me feel a sense of bondage. The doing of one more thing feels like a religious practice to my soul rather than forward movement.
And so… In the midst of this processing, I asked Holy Spirit, “What do you have to say about all of this?” He said, “Amanda, you are on the right track, but you are missing something very important. You need more love. More love towards yourself and towards what I’ve done. See you cannot live from the mindset of “I’m not doing enough. I am not enough.” That isn’t a kingdom mindset at all. That is a Luciferian mindset and mold. Trying to gain more growth is good, but don’t think of an end goal.
Now listen… The thoughts coursing through the frequency of your blood tell you Jesus is the end goal, but that frequency is actually lying to you because Jesus is truly the starting point. He is the entry point into more. He opens the door into the realm of the Kingdom; and we both know the Kingdom contains much more when you walk in through Him.”
Then I said, “Okay, well then my next question is: What am I missing for this breakthrough? I know I am supposed to be learning something here and I am. I am being patient, but I need more answers. I need more understanding for this. I need more wisdom in this area.” He said, “Okay, the answer is to take another step. Faith is the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things unseen. What you need is present in the realm of Heaven, but your blood thoughts are not life-giving. Their frequency is impure and they have left you feeling like you don’t need to have more faith because you’ve done enough. That’s untrue. There is always room for more faith because there is always room for more grace. Grace and faith grow together in your life. You should always have an adequate amount of grace cushioning the faith you are accessing. You are trading into the Kingdom with faith. You need that faith to be actively supported by grace. You need to see that the faith you’re using is constantly supported by grace, not by the law. The law says, ‘I am not enough and I am not doing enough.’ However, grace gives you the permission and the freedom to reach out and pursue more faith. You need both.”
Then I asked, “How does that play out in real time? How does the faith of what I am believing in manifest in my life now? How does my faith manifest through my gifts and talents?” He said, “It’s not so much a matter of manifestation through your gifts and talents. It will come. It’s more so a question of ‘What do you believe in your heart and in your blood? What do you believe about faith and about grace?’ You are overwhelmed because the frequency of your blood is telling you to become perfect. It’s a skewed interpretation of perfection. It’s not at all pure and holy because you don’t have a positive response to it. Your response is negative. The response causes you great pain. I would never cause you pain. That isn’t Me or like Me to do that. I am expecting you to grow and to transcend the current position you are in with more grace and more faith.
But, your blood is asking you to grow into more of the law and more bondage with what it’s been saying. These are all untrue narratives. I would never place a glass ceiling above you. And that’s what the frequency of your blood is doing. It is giving a false perception of grace and faith. But it is false and it is binding. It is preventing you from ascending and expanding upwards into greater levels of grace and faith.
Amanda, the goal is to operate from the tree of life, which operates in grace…. in redemption.”
Truly seeing what He was saying I said, “Well… Then… What should I do about this?” He said, “You need to step into the court of mercy and repent for not allowing grace to be present. You’ve been living from the law. You’ve been living from frustration of the law. The law is making you feel like you must do every single thing or everything will go south. The frequency of your blood is saying that too. You must repent and then you must both step into the court of cancellation and ask for these false verdicts to be overturned and replaced with righteous verdicts that say that you are free to operate and move in grace within everything you do, including business. And that you would like to access deeper measure of both grace and faith.”
So, with that, I stepped into the mercy court. I repented for the frequency of my blood and it’s thoughts. I also repented for the thoughts and ways past generations had knowingly or unknowingly perceived the Kingdom and God to be. Then I stepped into the court of cancellation and asked for every false verdict be overturned and that righteous verdicts would be put in their place. Then I went to the court of reclamation and got all of my stuff back that Satan stole from me over my entire lifetime because of the false verdicts and the unholy frequency of my blood.
Since Sunday, I’ve felt like a new human. I can think clearer. My vibration and frequency feel more connected to the realm of Heaven and my spirit. And, I have more peace about stepping forward by grace through faith. 🌱
Copyright © 2022 Cultivate Life, All rights reserved.