Author: Amanda

J Man

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This is J Man… Most know Him as Jesus.

He was created a year ago by my ever-so gifted and talented sister Bridget. (The stories on how He was created and why would blow your mind- Maybe I’ll share them one day)

You know… He’s moved with us all over NYC. Yep, each borough we’ve lived in, He’s been with us!

At first it seemed absurd to carry this 5ft canvas with us everywhere we’ve lived, but 6 moves later we’re just grateful that He’s finally in His new home in Queens.

You know… The past 3 weeks have been full of failure upon failure. And there have definitely been moments when I’ve wanted to throw in the towel and tell God, “I’m out ✌🏻.” But then this morning, while I was praying, I looked up and saw J Man… J Man and His big ole bobble head floating above me. And instead of feeling discouraged, doubtful and in disbelief, I was reminded that He’s literally been on this journey with us the entire time. Through all of the moments we’ve wondered if we’d “make it” or if we’re still on the “path,” He’s been a friendly reminder to keep moving forward.

And you know… I don’t know where you are in life today. I don’t know how many failures and disappointments you’ve experienced; however, I do know J Man is real. He’s real and He’s alive when we let Him, Father God and Holy Spirit take the lead in our lives. And I know that’s challenging almost all the time, but I’ve learned every failure is an open door to the next opportunity He wants to lead us too. And even when we make mistakes (like the BIG spiritual one I recently made) He’s ALWAYS there to reroute the path and make up for what was lost.

So where ever you are, and how ever the divine presents Himself to you, please always be willing to follow! It’s 100% worth every step you take! 🌱♥️ #cultivatelife #justlive #bridgetwinderart #jman

What A Wonderful Life

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This is my grandmother. You know she was healed in 1975 of a rare bone condition. Yep… On her death bed, in a neck brace and body cast for 19 1/2 years, didn’t have feeling in more than half of her body BUT the power of God’s Holy Spirit transformed her in a single moment.

I miss her. I miss her a lot.

You know… After she was healed, Holy Spirit led she and my grandfather into full-time ministry. She would lay hands on the sick and they were made well through Jesus. She would speak to darkness, demons and things that scare the majority of us and they would flee. People began to live freer, fuller lives after experiencing the power of Holy Spirit inside of her.

You know… If you google “Delores Winder” you probably won’t find much more than a few videos of a tiny woman, with white hair, blue eyes that pierce your soul and a voice that sounds so strange yet captivating.

I always wanted to be just like her. Not the physical attributes… The spiritual ones.

You know… We butted heads a lot. Especially when I’d take the things she taught me and advance them for today’s culture. I always saw the world a little bit different. I always saw so much capacity for restoration, transformation and cultivation on a world-scale.

But gosh… To follow Him like she did… With so much ease that God was “taking care of things.” To have the faith that He would keep providing more than enough because that’s who He is and has always been. To just stay in the present moment and be like Jesus. Those… Those are still goals.

And maybe… Maybe I’m more like her than I even realize; however, I do believe the way she chose to live is one of the main reasons I keep choosing to live like this. To be constantly full of God’s presence, of love, of joy, of peace and of prosperity…. What a wonderful life! 🌱 #cultivatelife #justlive

Doubtful Disbelief

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“Stop what you’re doing!”… That’s what doubt and disbelief scream at me. “Stop what you’re doing and don’t move forward because you’re a fool and this is ridiculous.”

And it’s like that every time I step out in faith… I feel great at first. I feel like, I can “take on the world.” I feel like the hand of cards I placed on the table is being played nicely.

And then… Then huge waves of doubt and disbelief come. And they remind me of the past. They remind me how disappointed I’ve felt at times for excepting one thing and receiving another. They remind me how long the journey has been without the promises fulfilled. They remind me of the isolation I feel for following Holy Spirit instead of listening to man-made systems and structures. They remind me of the death, pain and sacrifice I’ve been through to get today… The people and places I’ve lost and the relationships that went sour. They remind me that I don’t know what I’m actually doing in life, nor do I have any control at all.

I hate doubt and disbelief.

But… Well, without them… Would taking the risk even be a thing? If my past, present and future weren’t all on the table ready to be gambled at my own free-will, then would I even be in God’s will?

And so I step back… I step back with humility, and I remember how much I develop, mature and grow every time I’m faithful. I remind myself that God’s never EVER left my side… If anything we’ve grown closer. I also remind myself how good it feels to flourish on the inside when I’m faced with challenge and adversity that are larger than me. And then… Then I step forward with a positive attitude and a clean, yet faithful heart. 🌱 #cultivatelife #justlive

I Cried

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I cried on the train this morning. I cried on the train this morning because it’s time to take another risk… Another gamble… Another giant leap of faith forward with God.

And you know what? That’s still challenging for me.

It’s still challenging to go, “You want me to do what next?! I’m tired of this journey. It’s long. It feels fruitless and frustrating at times. And do you see the world God? Wickedness is prospering like wildfire. The masses are distracted by the illusion of “life.” People are sick from the inside out. People are claiming “love” when it’s really just tolerance and acceptance. People have forgotten about YOU!!! When does it end? When does your Spirit breakthrough so healing can begin?!?!”

So I cried on the train this morning.

And then I felt a little bit better. And I wiped my tears out from under my big, brownish colored sunglasses. And I moved forward. I moved forward in the best way I know… With all of the faith, hope and love Father God has stored deep inside of me. 🌱 #cultivatelife #justlive

Focused?

Amanda

If I’m honest… Well then I’d have to say my focus hasn’t been 💯 lately. I feel like I’ve gone from 6-10 moderate responsibilities to 15-20 serious responsibilities.

And it’s not that I don’t want to be focused. Trust me… I know God needs my focus more than ever right now.

But it took me being 6 drinks in (I don’t drink heavy) to hear God screaming at me about my level of focus. Actually it felt like I couldn’t escape His voice in that moment. And I told my sister about it… Her response, “I doubt He was yelling at you Amanda. You were probably just LISTENING! You were focused.”

And since that moment… Well my thoughts have felt more focused and centered. I’m making a mental and emotional effort to really zone in on everything He’s laid in front of me.

And I don’t know where you stand with focusing on the will of God in your life; however, I truly hope you wake up with every intent to pursue His purposes for your life. I mean, I know what He wants usually requires our selflessness… But then, it’s so rewarding to follow… To grow… To truly deepen the fullness of life He’s laid before us. And… Sometimes (when we really give it our all) we actually play a part in making a difference in our world 😉🌱 #cultivatelife #justlive #focus

One Broken Vessel

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Healing and wholeness have always been such a pinnacle part of who I am. And it’s not a mystery to me why I’m drawn to the supernatural power of God. It’s in my spiritual DNA.

Growing up I saw my grandmother lay hands on countless people… People riddled with cancer, sick and dying from the inside out… And after she laid her hands on them, the power of the Holy Spirit transformed them… They walked away completely healed, whole and filled with life and the eternal.

Which is why there are days, like today, when I find myself so caught up on thoughts of restoration… On thoughts of what our country would look like if we would simply lower our prideful, misguided, broken hearts and pursue the healing power of God.

You see I believe healing and wholeness will come when we can truly recognize that we are so much more than flesh and blood… We aren’t our outer appearance. We aren’t race, ethnicity, gender, sexual orientation, religion or political backgrounds and parties. We are eternal. We are spirits with souls… Souls that are longing to be made whole so that we can be led by Holy Spirit into the truth of Jesus Christ.

And I don’t know what it will take for our broken, dying and practically dead nation to see this truth. But I do pray… I pray that Jesus will continue to restore all that we are… One broken vessel at a time. 🌱♥️ #cultivatelife #justlive

But Are You Loyal?

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Have you ever loved someone so much you’d practically do anything for them…. Even when you don’t want too because the thing you’ve been asked to do requires more of you than you’d really like to give?

I have.

Actually that’s where my relationship with God constantly stands. You see it’s become this place where I listen and I follow, even when it’s NOT what I WANT TO DO.

Because I remember being 17 years old. I remember my grandmother speaking into my life. I remember her saying, “Amanda I see where you’re headed in life. I see you on a path. You will stay very close to God. Your feet will never get off of His path.”

His path to life is an interesting one though. I spend more time with Him than anyone realizes… And I feel like in this time He takes all that I am that’s ugly and makes it beautiful. He completely uproots the negative, leaving love, peace and joy inside of me. You know, enough to leak out and share with others.

And I guess I’m sharing this because I want you to know that being loyal to your relationship with God is very fruitful. Yeah, it’s a constant choice of staying true to what He’s asked… But it’s also filled with more life and love than I ever imagined I’d encounter.

So if you know Him… If you’ve spent time in His presence and can hear His voice, than please be encouraged to keep cultivating that relationship. It will produce more fruit in you than you can fathom. And He’ll most likely ask you to do things you never saw yourself doing before. 🌱 #cultivatelife #justlive