Would You Risk It?

You know… As a girl raised in America I’ve had just about everything I could ever really need or ask for. I watched my parents struggle as they successfully created the business my father owned and operated. And then I sat back and wondered how we went from living in a very small house to a house bigger then we ever needed. It seemed as I got older we were just able to afford more and so we constantly did more. I mean that is the “American Dream” right?

However, when my father died life got really challenging for my family to manage. From my perspective, it seemed like God needed us to completely abandon this love, adoration and comfort we’d all attained for money and things so that we would focus on Him and Him alone.

Now I know what you’re thinking, “Oh Amanda, I know what loving money is and I don’t care for it that much.” The crazy thing is, most of us rely on and have faith in our jobs, bank accounts and savings accounts more than God.

You see I believe the majority of us live such a comfortable life. We have everything we truly need, but then we’ve bought a lie that we don’t have enough. We believe we’re doing something wrong so we consume more. It’s a constant vicious cycle that none of us are really brave enough to end because we’re all too afraid.

However, over the past five years I’ve learned (and continue to learn) that I only really need faith in God to live, survive and thrive. I don’t need all of these things society tells me I need. I am content with learning and growing and attaining spiritual wealth. I believe it’s what we’re truly designed for.

And I don’t know why I am sharing this. This area of my life is something I keep very private; however, if we really truly have faith in God… Then can we take the risk and cultivate a lifestyle based on our needs rather than our constant desire for what we want? 🌱🌷 #cultivatelife

The Smallest Seed

The smallest seed planted in the garden… The one that is cultivated with hope and love… That’s what faith is.

It’s not always easy. It’s sometimes a challenge. It requires a lot of feeding, sunlight and attention, but I promise you it will grow into something bigger than you imagined.

Faith is lifestyle my friends.

It’s not something we pick up when we’re desperate for healing or an answer. It’s an alive being we coast through life with. It is the foundation which we should all be build upon.

And Jesus… You know that guy everybody seems to argue about. Yeah, He’s kind of like the sun in the sky… Always willing and able to provide the light the seed will continuously need to get up and grow.

So please, please be encouraged to have faith in your heart… Even when conditions look way to dark to develop and grow. 🌸💃🏻 #cultivatelife

(More in video below!)

Remember When?

Remember when you were a kid and your parent said, “We’re not there yet. Sit back and enjoy the ride.”?… But then you, without understanding the concept of waiting, became overly frustrated and tired of riding…

That’s where I am in life right now. I am tired of this journey I’m on with God. I can’t explain it, but I’m just worn out with the bread crumb trail He keeps leading me down.

And I know the weariness of it all won’t last very long, but my question is, “What do I do until then? How do I stay content with my reality?”

You see I don’t understand how Jesus followed the Holy Spirit so well. There were moments when He seemed to wrestle with where He was being led, but for the most part He was so obedient to His Father in Heaven.

And I don’t know if you ever feel the way I do right now. But I do know that following God’s plan is a constant. It seems like just as we arrive at one destination He’s giving us the plan for the next journey. And if He’s not giving us the plan, then He’s asking us to wait on it until it’s fully developed.

And so I guess I want to encourage anyone that feels out of sorts with God right now to be patient. Be patient and be kind to yourself. I mean… You’ve come this far with Him right?! I believe in all of your travels He didn’t bring you this far to just leave you weary and tired from the journey. Instead, I believe He wants to lift you up and give you new strength for what ever is ahead.

Grown Up

“Ok… So here’s the plan: we’re gonna come home, help mom, sell the house and move on with our lives. This will take three months tops!” I firmly believe God laughed at my plan that day. To think, after everything my family had been through, that it would only take us three months to help mom. I was ridiculous to think such a thought.

You see over the last year and a half, I’ve had to grow up. There’s no other way to explain what I’ve experienced. Has it been painful? Yeah, parts of it have been extremely painful, confusing and altogether frustrating. Has it been fun? Sure it’s been fun! I mean have you met my sister before? She is THE entertainment.

But you know, I wouldn’t trade this time of growth for anything. Because in this time God has truthfully taken so many broken areas of my life and my family’s life and healed them. And He’s also pushed me really, really hard to be where I am today.

Now, I didn’t really appreciate the dark moments. I didn’t really prefer the moments when I thought money was going to run out and we were going to have to file bankruptcy. But, gosh I wouldn’t trade those experiences for the world. Because in the midst of them I learned how to truly rely on God for everything… I learned how to trust Jesus for restoration in areas I didn’t believe could be fixed… And I had to follow the Holy Spirit, even when I couldn’t see.

So where do I go from here now that the house is sold and mom is settled? Well in this moment, I just choose to believe, listen and follow where ever He leads me… Stay tuned to see 😉!

Life of Wants…

IMG_5122I want… I want… I want…

I live my life by a system of wants…

They surround me each and every day… They fill my conscious and subconscious mind constantly…

I’ve never had a birthday or Christmas where I didn’t receive something that I wanted…

You could easily say my culture has breeded a “need” for want in me…

Ironically, I don’t actually need any of my wants… Because to live we only really need water, food, clothing, shelter and a sense of love from those that surround us…

And so it wasn’t until yesterday… Yesterday in the middle of a movie that it hit me so directly…

I believe, my entire life, God has surrounded me… That His desire to love me has been there… Like I believe it is equally there for every human…

But my entire life I’ve ignored that love… The one thing I’ve personally learned produces security, confidence and identity, I’ve lacked…

And, instead… I’ve bought lie upon lie reminding me that my security, confidence and identity are found in making more money, buying more things, influencing more people and having/doing what’s “better or good”…

Yes, I did grow up in church… In a very spiritual/religious household… Where I was told that confidence, security and identity are found in God through Jesus…

However… No one taught me how to actually find these truths and cultivate a lifestyle of them… I was more so pushed towards reading the Bible and listening to a pastor… Saying I have these things, but not actually possessing them in reality…

And I’m not angry or bitter with anyone or anything… I’m more so realizing that the one thing I’ve needed my entire life is the love of Father God…

Because His love is the one thing I can’t live without… Because, without it, I won’t ever feel truly satisfied, confident and secure… And that my identity is right in the midst of it all…

And I am unsure where all of this is taking me… Where the Holy Spirit is leading me… But I do trust that a lifestyle securely founded on a need truly outweighs a lifestyle securely founded on a want…