capacity · change · follow · gift · keep moving forward · mature · Perseverance

Gifts for the Mountain of Maturity

Last Tuesday, Holy Spirit presented me an endless pile of gifts. I saw them in the spirit, wrapped in white paper with giant pink bows and received them with open arms. He told me most of the gifts were locked and needed a key. I asked if I could start opening the gifts that don’t have keys. He said, “Yes.” So, I opened the first one. It was a harness. He said, “The mountain you’ve been climbing is about to get steep. You need this harness. It will ensure your protection and security.” So, I put the harness on. Then, I saw a rope, a hook and a helmet. The angels handed them to me. Holy Spirit said, “You need all of these items to climb to the place, to the top of where you’re going. Yes, it’s steep, but you are protected from an impending fall. You’re protected from hitting the ground. If you come loose from the side of the mountain, grasp hold again and climb. There is a top. There is a peak coming. It’s ahead. You need these gifts to help make the summit easier.” Then I saw a light on the helmet. Holy Spirit said, “The light lets you know you won’t always be climbing in the daylight. You’ll need to keep going through the night. Keep persevering even when you want to stop. If you want to rest, just hang there for a moment on the rope, lean into My goodness and strength and catch your breath. Then keep moving forward.”

Before I could ask Him about the mountain, I saw gloves. He said, “I’ve noticed your thoughts lately. You keep thinking your hands feel weak and tired. These gloves will give your hands the strength they need to keep pulling you up the mountain.” I said, “The gloves look just like my hands. They are a literal copy of my flesh.” He said, “Yes, but they give you strength. Don’t mind their appearance. It is good and necessary. Oh, and one more thing!” Then I saw a tube of lipstick. I laughed, and said, “This seems silly. Why is it here?” He said, “Put it on. It will amplify your voice as you go so others hear you when you speak. It’s forever stay too. You don’t have to reapply it. It just lasts. Everlasting.”

Immediately after receiving the gifts, I asked, “What is this mountain I am climbing?” Holy Spirit said, “The mountain of maturity.”

Then I asked, “How will I change?” He said, “Remember the other day when you had the thought, ‘I don’t know who I see when I look at myself in the mirror? I am changing again and I can see it.” I said, “Yes, I remember.” He said, “Okay, well it’s because you’re stepping into a higher elevation of maturity. Maturity that solely belongs to you. That’s where you’re headed. It’s maturity that’s been marked out for you for a long time. And you’re coming into it now. Best part? You aren’t late growing into it. You’re right on time. 100% on time for this.”

Now, I am tired in so many ways right now. Following Holy Spirit’s lead takes a lot of dedication: spirit, soul, heart and body. And yes, yes, my soul has stepped back in a tremendous way and relied on a place of rest while my spirit takes the lead; however, I am still tired of moving towards what seems like an endless summit to the top of all He’s laid before me.

Still, I put on the harness and gear I need to climb up the steep peak. And, I don’t know what to climb up will entail yet. I don’t know how it will push me and force me to come into a place of full growth. I am kind of nervous, but also very assured with the truth that God has provided me with what I need to climb up. 

I am actually so assured that I asked my angels about the mountain. They’ve been very quiet for the past few weeks. Every time I engage them to converse, they let me know that they can’t speak. They are very busy. However, two days ago, I heard Topucca (my lead advancing angel—who is on assignment to advance the plans of the Kingdom of God into the earth). He came forward. I said, “Where have you been? I haven’t spoken to you in so long. It’s been weeks.” He said, “Yes, I know we’ve been very, very busy. There’s a lot happening in the heavens and earth right now. It’s very good. Don’t pay much attention to the optics you see coming out of the media. Leave it alone. Stay focused on the Father. In Him and through Him all things stand and are new. 

Amanda, God has been prepping your heart for a new level of maturity. It is very good. The gifts He gave you yesterday for this next phase of the climb are good. You need them to summit. They will help you. Remember, the gifts are there to catch you when you begin to feel tired or like you might fall. Also, listen to me. Capacitate. It’s time to capacitate again. It’s time to allow the Father to stretch you into a new dimension of life. You will need this dimension going into the new year. Giants will… Let me repeat myself… Giants will fall next year. It’s time for them to come down all over the world. Specifically in realms you’ve been pursuing.”

Now, I haven’t a clue where you are in your track of cultivation right now. I don’t know how Holy Spirit is working with you to refine, develop, grow and mature every ounce of potential and gifting He’s placed inside of you. But, I do know that He is wanting to provide all of us with the gifts and materials needed to keep moving forward. So where ever you are, pursue His heart, lean into what the Kingdom has for you and then do not be afraid to use what He’s given to it’s full potential. I know I will! 🌱

glory · goodness of god · kingdom · Manifestation · stillness

Summer of Stillness

If you followed my writings over the past summer, then you know I shared about stillness and the glory of God a lot. At one point, I mentioned that Holy Spirit said, “How are people going to know that I am truly with you, if you won’t let My stillness rest upon you? It’s okay to be still. It’s okay to not have any movement going on in you. That doesn’t mean things aren’t moving. Instead, it means you’re cultivating a space to carry the weight of My glory, which you’ve never truly carried before. And sure, sure it’s cumbersome. Sure, being still is not your favorite thing because you want to be doing, but I have called you to a life of stillness: spirit, soul, heart and body right now. A life of stillness that mediates on My goodness constantly.”

And so, when I wasn’t working, you could find me sitting in silence without any distractions (phone, TV, computer), commanding my soul to step back and inviting my spirit to come forward so I could engage with the stillness. And, in those moments of stillness, my mind was mostly quiet. I didn’t hear Holy Spirit speaking too often, but I did feel a very significant amount of His presence and glory growing and surrounding me as I mediated on His goodness.

Below are three stories (from the summer) that demonstrate the growing manifestation of His presence.

The Smoke

On June 17, at 2 am I woke up to the smell of thick, thick smoke. The smell was so strong that I was convinced something was on fire. I woke my sister (who is usually awake at 2am) up. She could smell it too. We both firmly agreed something was on fire. So, we hurried towards the windows in back of the apartment. Bridget said, “I don’t smell anything outside of the windows. It’s not coming from over here.” Then she turned on the lights and the room looked kind of hazy, like smoke was definitely in the room. Next, she checked the radiator pipes that run through the apartment for the heat in winter. Again, nothing. I checked the windows in my room. Nothing. We checked the hallway. Nothing. So, it was evident that the smoky smell and haze was isolated to our apartment unit only.

We both kind of laughed about it and confidently decided to go back to sleep. Convinced it was occurring within the spirit realm surrounding us. 

When I woke up the next morning, I consulted Holy Spirit. He led me to Isaiah 4:5. It says, “Then the Lord will create over all of Mount Zion and over those who assemble there a cloud of smoke by day and a glow of flaming fire by night; over everything the glory will be a canopy.” Again, I kind of laughed because both of our spirits knew that’s what we had experienced. But, before I could confirm for sure, I called my mom. I told her the story and she said, “You know Amanda, last night I had a dream y’all were in a fire in NYC, but you were okay. When I woke up, I felt a little panicked, but I knew y’all were fine.” 

Why did God reveal Himself to us like this? I still don’t have all of the answers; however, I am confident that we were so confident in the manifested demonstration of His presence that we went back to sleep without a worry or a doubt.

The Tears

During the month of June, my sister was working on a painting of her spirit. She said, “Amanda, there’s water on the floor in front of the painting, but I don’t have a clue where it came from.” I walked over to the painting, and, sure enough, there were several droplets on the floor that resembled tears. We both backtracked the past hour and decided there was no way either one of us was responsible for the water. So again, we knew they manifested from the spirit realm surrounding us. But why? 

Over the next few days, the Father made it clear that He was very overwhelmed with what my sister was bringing to life. It moved Him to tears to see that she was so interested in putting paint to canvas to watch the truth surrounding her spirit come to life.

The Diamond

In mid-July, I had been sitting on the living room couch all day working on my computer. After several hours, I got up and went to my room to sit with Holy Spirit and focus in on being still. After I had been sitting for a while, my sister rushed in my room to tell me Britney Spears was testifying in court and we could listen to the stream on Twitter. So, we both sat on the end of my bed and listened. When it was over, we both gleefully left my room (research the case if you want to know why) and went back to the living room. She sat down on the couch where I had been sitting all day and said, “Amanda, what is this?” In her hand she was holding what looked like a tiny rhinestone. She said, “Did this fall off of a piece of clothing?” We both thought through all of the clothing we own and decided it didn’t. Then she said, “Actually, I don’t think it’s a rhinestone. I think it’s a diamond!” So, she rushed over to her phone and pulled up a YouTube video to verify a diamond. The video said we needed to drop it in a glass of water. If it sank, it was surely a diamond. So, she filled up a clear glass, took it into the bathroom and I dropped the tiny stone into the water. Sure enough, the diamond went straight to the bottom. 

Then we checked every piece of jewelry. Nothing missing. We asked our friends that had been over. They weren’t missing anything. We asked my mom. She wasn’t missing anything. So, again, we laughed. Surely, this did not fall from the spirit realm surrounding us? Or did it? And if so, what was God’s plan for it? To show that the very presence of Heaven is surrounding us at all times? To encourage us to keep engaging Heaven? To demonstrate the realness of the realm of Heaven, that often feels like a caricature of sorts?

And while I don’t have too many answers, I am sure of this… Engagement with our human spirit, paired with stillness and meditation on the goodness of God can bring about some very unique manifested experiences. And while we haven’t stumbled upon another diamond yet, we have had many more experiences with hazy smoke and tears. They just seem to appear in places where we’ve been mediating on the goodness of God, while paving a road for angelic assistance and operating in the gifts, purposes and trading routes Holy Spirit is constantly laying before us.

So if you’re reading this, I want to encourage you to take the time to cultivate a relationship with your human spirit, Holy Spirit and stillness. Take many undistracted moments (moments without technology) to just mediate on areas of your life where you know He provided for, protected, healed, delivered, connected with and loved you. And then see where that takes you. Look around for the growth of His manifested presence within your life. I promise you, you won’t just feel it, you may just see it too! And the best part is, mediating on the goodness of God will become a part of your lifestyle and you will consistently see His glory revealed. 🌱

angels · anointing · gemstone · grow · kingdom · mature · power

The Gem of Anointing

For about a month now, I’ve been asking Holy Spirit if I can share a spiritual experience I had. I mean… It was fascinating!! So, I couldn’t wait for Him to give me the notion to “move forward.”

About a month ago I was praying, listening to Him and speaking to my human spirit… Then, very suddenly, I saw this giant gemstone in the spirit. It was HUGE. About the width of my chest. Very bright and shiny. Very suddenly it started moving towards me, and I watched as angels screwed it into a large opening that instantly appeared inside my spirit’s chest.

Then, I got a separate view of the process… And I saw the large gemstone actually lay itself onto a smaller gemstone that was already inserted inside of my spirit.

OBVIOUSLY, I immediately wanted to know what I just experienced… And so, Holy Spirit began to explain…

He said, “That large gemstone is your anointing. The small gemstone is the heart of your spirit. See how crystal clear the small gem is? That’s because the light is shinning brightly through your fractals. All of your redemptive gifts are being used. And because the light from your spirit has become so bright and strong, I am having angels install this stone of anointing inside of you. It’s your anointing I am giving YOU. It’s separate from the one your grandmother carried. This is yours. I designed it for you and you alone. It fits your spirit in such an intricate way. And it can grow. As your spirit matures and grows in deeper intimacy with Me, the power of that stone will mature and grow. And more of Me will streamline from it.”

Then He went on to explain that everyone that comes into the Kingdom of Heaven has an anointing because it’s part of our inheritance in Christ. He also told me to stop viewing the anointing the way I was raised to view it. He said, “Religion placed people with strong gifts on pedestals and then called that gift the ‘anointing.’ And, while some of that is true, it’s not all true because everyone has redemptive gifts, spiritual gifts AND an anointing that are all separate from each other, but work together when you access them and cultivate a strong relationship with them.”

Now, if you’re anything like me… Or if you know me in the least bit, then you’ll understand that I was immediately eager to start cultivating a relationship with the stone. I mean… The stone, when activated and used, unlocks so much untapped power and a world full of mystery that is begging to be discovered.

And so that’s exactly what I’ve been doing. I’ve been using this very challenging season of maturity to learn about, operate in and pursue my anointing. Because I am learning that the anointing is vital to my personal track of maturity. I cannot move forward without it. It is essential to ruling & reigning in the Heavens and on Earth. It is pivotal in walking out any God-given, God-appointed mandate. And it is separate from gifting. It is separate from fractals of the human spirit. It is structured and built on presence. To be given or ignited within when the time is best.

And I am sharing this with you because I want to continue to encourage you to keep pursuing a relationship with Father God, Jesus, Holy Spirit AND the Kingdom of Heaven. Because when we do, we not only discover more levels of healing, restoration and deliverance, but we also come into a place where we can discover and learn about portions of our inheritance in Christ we never knew we could posses. And those portions, those gifts, those revelations, those anointings… Well they will provide us with the real and raw capability to move about the earth in such a way of power, dominion and authority I don’t believe we’ve ever seen before.

faith · follow · grow · heart · keep moving forward · refine

Following Growth

Growth… Growth & I have a love/hate relationship.

Wait… Let me rephrase that. Growth, as amazing as it is, feels like a antagonist in my life sometimes. Do I crave it? Sure I do! I crave growth and the results that come from following through with where I’m being led to develop and mature in life. I crave the feeling of becoming a healthier vessel from the inside out!

And, over the years, I’ve read so many books… You know the ones that encourage you to “Think and Grow Rich.” The ones that encourage you to focus on self-love, manifestations and such… And while those methods for growth have worked in my life, none of them have been as powerful or as long-lasting as following the Holy Spirit and His supernatural growth track.

His system… His ways… His ability to lead me in the best direction, customized and centered around what I need to grow is the most powerful and pure thing I’ve ever encountered.

And sure… Sure it’s filled with a lot of walks through valleys and continual climbing of mountains with a lot of highs and lows… However, the greatest part… The most amazing piece about following the Holy Spirit is the relationship that’s birthed within the process of following. It’s a feeling that’s greater than any self-love or love from another because it meets me at the very core of my spirit, heart and soul. It’s God’s love. His perpetual love makes the growth process worth every inch of the journey.

And I don’t know who I’m speaking to when saying this, but God (in His very essence) is completely interested in growing with US. He needs us as much as we need Him. And if we (I’m mainly speaking to myself) can just continue to follow with a pure and steady heart… A heart that wants to be free from all of the darkness, sickness, depression, fear and anxiety we’re feeling… Then I believe He will continue to help us grow into the most beautiful trees of LIFE… Trees of LIFE firmly planted within His garden of LIFE! 🌱 #cultivatelife #keepmovingforward

capacity · focus · heart · process

Heaven’s Pace

Last week I told you that God was examining my heart again…

Of course, in the moment I didn’t really understand what the examination was all about. I mean… He does inspect it quite often, but this time… This time felt different. 

So, in true “Amanda form,” I questioned Him about it.

His response, “I’m checking out your capacity. You’ve been asking me for two months to increase your capacity, and I’m ready to do it. So, here I am inspecting the middle ground of your being to make sure it’s prepared to handle the increase of responsibilities I’m sending your way.”

Okay… When I heard this, I was truly excited!

You see over the years I’ve learned that God will not give us more than we contain. Sure, the world’s system has a way of offering us piles of things we aren’t prepared for, but God… God is unique in the fact that He never wants to overwhelm our refinement, development, maturity and growth. Meaning, we can incessantly ask for things, but He’s probably not going to hand them over until we’ve matured into the version of self that He needs us to be.

His process is holy you know?.. It offers us the grace to go at Heaven’s pace. And sure… Sure it takes times to get where we’re going; however, when we do get there, we are able to contain the weight of the responsibilities He’s entrusted us with because we have the capacity to hold it.

And I don’t know if I’m making perfect sense when explaining this; however, I do hope and pray you are inspired to remain focused with where He has you right now. I hope you don’t settle and begin to chase after systems that will ultimately lead to death and destruction of your spirit, soul and heart. Because, I believe, the refinement, development maturity and growth He’s taking you through will provide you with the capacity you need to move forward in every aspect of life. 🌱 #cultivatelife

capacity · focus · grow · heart · process

“Bettering” My Heart

Oh boy… I hear it again, “What’s in your heart Amanda? I’m searching your innermost parts to see what’s planted there and what kind of ground it’s growing on. Are you going to let me have the things that are languishing? Are you going to surrender the fear that’s keeping you from moving forward? And what about the healthy roots that have been established on good ground? Are you going to focus on them and the life they’re giving, or are you going to disregard them because you desire growth in other areas you aren’t ready for yet? Tell me what’s happening inside of you.”

Yes, it’s true. God examines my heart a lot. He inspects the middle ground of my spirit, soul and body more times than I’d like; however, His inspection is always for good measure. He’s always looking to refine areas in me that are broken, afraid and seemingly a little lost. And then He’s constantly prepared to show me other areas that have grown beyond my wildest comprehension.

And, to be quite honest, it’s challenging to listen to God’s plan for “bettering” my heart. But it’s also so good. So good that I have to say, “Okay God, let’s do this! Bring inner healing and deliverance to these areas. Oh, and please teach me how to increase here. I want to thrive at a higher frequency so that I may cultivate a greater capacity for life.

You see I’m sharing this because I hope you have a similar relationship with Him. I hope you live and operate from a real, true spiritual reality, rather than the false reality that’s marketed to us on the regular.

Because living through the lens of God’s reality means that we are constantly and consistently willing to lean into the Kingdom of God and all it has to offer us. It means we meet every challenge He presents us with with gladness in our hearts. Because, when we do… When we truly begin to live from His perspective, well I believe we will cultivate lives (spirit, soul, heart and body) beyond our wildest dreams. 🌱♥️ #cultivatelife

develop · follow · grow · keep moving forward · refine

Fully Grasp It

Do you wanna know what moving forward with Holy Spirit looks like for me right now?

It’s choosing to FULLY trust in everything He’s cultivated inside of me.

Yep… I feel challenged deep in my spirit to believe… To FULLY believe in the LIFE He’s helped me refine, develop, nurture, mature and grow.

And, honestly the challenge I feel feels… Well It feels large.

Actually… It’s like there’s a giant tree standing in front of me. A tree that’s blossoming and blooming fruit, flowers and shades of life and glory I never realized existed until I encountered them.

And I’m having to FULLY grasp the truth that everything I see is going on inside of me at this very moment!

And I don’t know where you are right now. My greatest hope is that you’re filled with so much life it’s flowing out of you and touching the lives of those you encounter. However, if you do feel like me, if you’re having trouble believing in what you see… Then PLEASE be encouraged to ask Holy Spirit to reveal truth to you. Please ask Him to fully reveal the LIFE He’s cultivated inside of your heart. And, if you realize there are areas that are languishing and dying, PLEASE be encouraged to ask Jesus to restore them… To restore them totally and completely 🌱 #cultivatelife

develop · grow · love of god

Ever-Growing

What’s real? What’s true? What’s eternally lovely and ever-growing? That… That is love.

However… It’s not human love. For human love is too faulty. Too futile. It’s too fatal.

You see this love, this love is pure. This love is whole and complete because it’s structured for one place and one place only.

What’s that place you may ask? That place is the heart.

Deep beneath the surface of the skin… Beneath the layers of the ill-beaten soul lies the heart. And it… It is THE prime real estate of the spirit. A place so deep and intimate I’m convinced no man or woman can fully know it.

You see I believe our hearts are created to contain a love that’s so powerful, so magnificent, so great that we cannot help but constantly be overrun with the joy of the Lord when we are consumed with it.

For this love… His love… It brings healing. It brings peace. It brings restoration. It stops anxiety and depression and calamity of all sorts in its tracks. It can stand on every single battlefield and win the war when darkness seems to overshadow life.

It’s the love of Father God. It’s the love that Jesus walked this earth in. It’s what I feel coming off of Holy Spirit when I’m in His presence. It’s the sweetest, most beautiful thing I’ve ever known. And it’s made… It crafted for me and for YOU! ♥️🌱 #cultivatelife #cultivatelove

Body · cultivation · freedom · healing · just live · love of god · restore · soul · Spirit

A Decade in the Making

Okay… Today, I hit the decade mark of losing 100 lbs! So… What does it mean to me to look at the girl on the left, the young woman on the right and the woman in the middle? Well… To me the three make up a cultivated lifestyle of restoration and freedom.

When I finished losing the weight, I didn’t realize I’d spend the next 10 years allowing Jesus to refine, develop, mature and grow me as a whole.

So when I look at these three photos I don’t see me… Instead I see Him… I see what He’s done in me.

You see, He’s taken a girl who was incredibly insecure, fearful, anxious, prideful, selfish, jealous and bitter… And He’s transformed her into a woman that’s confident, secure, courageous, at peace with the unknown, humble (I still struggle), selfless, grateful and full of joy towards others and myself!

When I started this journey I thought I knew Jesus. I thought I knew Father God. I thought I knew the Holy Spirit. I grew up believing in them, but life and death have taught me that I didn’t know them at all because I hadn’t experienced them on a personal level.

So today I can confidently say they are my foundation and source of life. Together, they constantly keep me strong, healthy and secure. While the past versions of me desperately searched for identity and security, today I believe I stand still on the truth that I can’t be shaken, tossed or turned. My life and all that I am is in Him.

And while the world around me continues to try to show me why I’m not thin enough, thick enough, tan enough, flawless enough, beautiful enough, smart enough, successful enough or even “godly” enough… Well guess what? His opinion of me is all that matters. And He says, “You’re more than enough Amanda because I’ve helped you become a new creation and given you new life through Christ.” 🌱 #cultivatelife

capacity · cultivation · develop · expansion · flourishing · grow · isolation · process

Expansion

I told my mom what God told me about blooming. She, who is always wiser than me, said, “Amanda, I know you’re excited, but remember this is going to be a PROCESS. Just like all of the growth you’ve experienced, blooming will take time. A bud doesn’t open overnight. It takes time to expand as it reveals the colorful world inside.”

You know… She’s absolutely right!

While most growth is painful, blooming is not. BUT it does require expansion. Which, like my mom said, takes TIME.

And if you know me, I get caught up with the time things take to get to where they need to be. Sure, I’ve gotten better over the years, but for the most part I still want things to happen faster than they do.

Blame it on our culture that’s centered on instant gratification I guess.

But in really, I’m not up for playing the blame game. I’m more into learning about the expansion process of the bloom!

It’s interesting too. It seems like all of a sudden timing is right. Timing is good. Timing is in season. So many pieces and parts I’ve hoped and prayed would come together are TRULY coming together.

And though there’s a place in me that’s nervous all the pieces coming together might separate again, I’m choosing to stay uplifted. I’m choosing to be strong in my mind, in my heart and in spirit. Because I believe it’s enough as life continues to expand and bloom.