heart · Spirit · truth

The Vault

I was in the spirit yesterday morning, praying and talking to God like normal… All of a sudden I saw a large brownish/maroonish/whiteish marbled wall that spanned down a hallway. I didn’t know where I was, so I asked Holy Spirit. He said, “You’re in your Heavenly mansion, and I want to show you something that’s locked inside of the vault of your heart.” 

“Cool!!” I thought. “I wonder what this is all about.”

The next thing I knew I found myself in a very large home my dad built and my family lived in in the early 2000s. As I walked around throughout the house, memories of that season came rushing into my mind. Suddenly, I was overwhelmed with the past. The way it felt. The way it sounded. The way it smelt. All of it was actively present and alive in front of me. 

As I walked around I began to wonder, “Okay, what’s this all about? Why am I here? God, why did you bring me to my Heavenly mansion to unlock the vault of my heart? And what does this season of my life have to do with what’s hidden inside of the vault?”


Then, He very carefully began to explain Himself. He showed me a huge truth I’d kept hidden from myself… An area where I chose to believe a lie, and then never stopped believing it. And, although, I’ve known the truth for years, I’ve chosen to push it further and further away from me. He said, “Amanda, you’ve allowed this lie to define who you are in this moment, but it cannot define you anymore. I want you to let it go. I want you to repent and renounce for cultivating it within the grounds of your heart. And then, then I want you to pick up the truth, plant it on this refined ground and then walk away from here covered in My boldness, confidence, humility and security.”

And so… So that’s what I did. I repented for holding onto the lie for so long. I renounced any stronghold or demonic entanglement I might be caught up in because of it. And then… Then I planted the seed of truth on the grounds of my heart.

And I tell you this story because I hope it encourages you to continue to follow Holy Spirit into hidden parts of yourself so that He may inspect the depths of your heart. Because, even after years of life-giving cultivation, there are STILL areas of our lives He can and will dig up so that we can flourish. And, I know a lot of the time we don’t want to follow Him into the past because it requires reliving things that are uncomfortable; however, the powerful thing about moving forward with Him is the truth that we will thrive on the other side. 🌱 #cultivatelife

Spirit · truth

Heaven’s Pace

Last week I told you that God was examining my heart again…

Of course, in the moment I didn’t really understand what the examination was all about. I mean… He does inspect it quite often, but this time… This time felt different. 

So, in true “Amanda form,” I questioned Him about it.

His response, “I’m checking out your capacity. You’ve been asking me for two months to increase your capacity, and I’m ready to do it. So, here I am inspecting the middle ground of your being to make sure it’s prepared to handle the increase of responsibilities I’m sending your way.”

Okay… When I heard this, I was truly excited!

You see over the years I’ve learned that God will not give us more than we contain. Sure, the world’s system has a way of offering us piles of things we aren’t prepared for, but God… God is unique in the fact that He never wants to overwhelm our refinement, development, maturity and growth. Meaning, we can incessantly ask for things, but He’s probably not going to hand them over until we’ve matured into the version of self that He needs us to be.

His process is holy you know?.. It offers us the grace to go at Heaven’s pace. And sure… Sure it takes times to get where we’re going; however, when we do get there, we are able to contain the weight of the responsibilities He’s entrusted us with because we have the capacity to hold it.

And I don’t know if I’m making perfect sense when explaining this; however, I do hope and pray you are inspired to remain focused with where He has you right now. I hope you don’t settle and begin to chase after systems that will ultimately lead to death and destruction of your spirit, soul and heart. Because, I believe, the refinement, development maturity and growth He’s taking you through will provide you with the capacity you need to move forward in every aspect of life. 🌱 #cultivatelife

soul · Spirit · truth

Come Up Here

”Gosh… It’s so beautiful up here. Up here above the chaos below.” That’s what I said to God as I peered out the window from the airplane. It was flying high above what looked like Heaven below.

And He’s been saying, “Come higher with Me.” And I’ve been arguing back, “No. No. NO! Because I don’t know what’s up there. And I have to let go of SO much more of what I want in life. This isn’t fair!”

God’s will… His view of what my life should continue to look like… It’s so freaking complex and misunderstood by my human mind. And… Honestly, it really takes me living through my spirit, rather than my soul and mind to continue to follow Holy Spirit where He’s leading.

But, through the deep struggle in my soul, I push through and relentlessly follow.

And now… Now I can begin to see what He’s been talking about… The reasons why He’s been asking me to, “come higher” and “cultivate life from a state of Heaven.”

And I know it sounds a little strange, but this place we just climbed to has more peace than I ever fathomed could be cultivated within myself. It’s just this constant, weightless feeling that I can’t describe with any single word but “Heavenly.”

Nothing really bothers me up here. My eyes are focused on Him and His will and I’m not overtaken with fear, stress, anxiety and worry. It’s just so still… Even though I have no clue what “next” is.

And I don’t know if this is where you are today. I don’t know what your relationship and path with God look like; however, I just want to speak from a place of encouragement and experience when saying this… Keep following Him. I know He’s frustrating and sees things in such a different WAY than we do, but when we truly trust and follow through wholeheartedly, I believe the destination is so incredibly rewarding. And no, no it doesn’t ever consist of a destination of power, fame or fortune. But it does consist of what we need for basic living… Which are the tools to continue to LIVE and cultivate a healthy lifestyle with Him 🌱 #cultivatelife

death · Spirit

It’s Just Heaven….. Right?

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I had a dream last night and dad was in it… I had a dream last night and he was talking about Heaven.

When I woke up it made me think about the book I gave hime to read right before he was diagnosed, “Heaven is for Real.” The movie was coming to theaters and I made the comment that I had read the book… so I went to my closet and got the book for him…. told him he could read it if he wanted… he read it in one sitting.

It’s funny to think back now about that moment. He was so close to Heaven and none of us thought that was about to become a reality… I think dad did though. He knew deep down within him what was ahead… what was in store for his future.

As Christians we’re taught to be Heaven bound… Heaven drawn…. closer to Heaven today than we were yesterday….. but honestly, well sometimes I wonder why we talk about a place we will be in forever.

If Earth was given to man to have authority over and subdue, then why do we feel this constant need to get away from it and to this so called magical land of perfection? Why can’t we enjoy this thing called time for a while and just live within it?

In a way, shouldn’t time be of value to us because one day we will live in a place without it? Our experience with time will be over so quickly…. I mean years on earth are so limited today.

Plus, why can’t we enjoy what’s around us and actually cultivate a good life?

I remember being in Bible class one time… the teacher was talking about Heaven and the book of Revelation… apparently I was beaming, so she pointed it out, “look how excited Amanda is to get there and be there.” In that moment I was pretty proud of myself. First because I was called out… and second because I was supposed to be excited about Heaven…. Right?

But today, today I feel different towards all of it. Because in so many different ways I want to live my life here on Earth. I know Earth is a difficult place to live on day…. with sickness, disease, wars, terror, fear and the rest… but good things still come out of it everyday.

Life can be good and kind and wonderful if we let it. Plus, it’s supposed to be a roller coaster. How boring would it be if we kept the same pace? How much would we hate it if there weren’t bumps a long the way like sickness, death and divorce? Then we might not learn lessons and become grateful for what we have.

So in so many ways, I am so thankful that we live on Earth…. that we have this advantage to create something special here… because we are going to be there one day.

And…. another thing…. I kind of believe Heaven is all around us. Like dad is around me. He’s not in a specific place…. but more like that place is all around me in another dimension and I can’t see it… but it’s going on everywhere. It’s so close to us, yet we are so far from it with all of the humanness we’ve taken on in being on Earth.

And since it is so close to us… we have a right to get closer to it by becoming better humans, kinder humans, more loving humans…. but I don’t think that our goal should be to become all of those things so we can get closer to Heaven. I think those things should be our goal because we want to make this world a better place… we want it to treat us the way we want to be treated.

And… in the end, when death does decide to become our reality…. we will be in Heaven and surrounded by goodness and love…. but how amazing is it that we get to spend time here…. here on Earth… with limits and boundaries and life lessons?