death · Spirit · truth

A Promise is A Promise

Six-and-a-half years ago my dad unexpectedly died. A month before he passed my parents had just celebrated their milestone 30th wedding anniversary. To celebrate, they planned to take a trip to Hawaii, but… Well obviously, that didn’t happen.

Last week my mom turned 60-years-old. So, in true Winder Sister form and fashion, Bridget and I decided to honor my parents plans by taking her to Hawaii to celebrate.

Now if I’m honest, I was excited the entire time! However, as we zipped up, down and around the island for the week, I never really thought about Dad much. I never truly let myself experience the weight of what it means to honor my parents by fulfilling a promise that was made within the covenant of their marriage.

And so, it wasn’t until we were actually headed to the airport that the heaviness of it all began to hit me. 

You see… Sickness, disease and death sought to destroy the Winder Women by completely robbing us of life and dragging us down a long and sometimes dark path of brokenness, heartache and pain. However, that’s what’s so magnificent about restoration! It’s this beautiful, systematic process where God promises too deeply and divinely heal us from the darkness that has torn us apart: spirit, soul, heart and body.

And… Somewhere along the way, the healing becomes a fulfilled process in certain areas… And you’re able to look at the life (like we have with this trip) and confidently say, “Yeah, dad’s not here… Yes, life has been an emotional, painful, uncertain climb we sometimes didn’t believe we’d make it through; however, we are holding God to His promises. And His promises say, “He WILL vindicate us and bring life to every place the kingdom of darkness has stolen.” His promises say, “He WILL redeem, restore and then supply us with endless joy!” His promises say, “He WILL cultivate the grounds of our brokenness so that they can be made whole, and then we can walk in the maturity of His confidence, security and love.”

And so you see… It is completely healthy to walk through fire and then emerge refined, restored and redeemed. It’s completely healthy to emerge without an ounce of bitterness, anger, hate, heartache and insecurity. It’s completely healthy to emerge more equipped with a heavier, holier suit of armor than when you walked in. 

Because when you do… When you actually surrender your pain, heartache and brokenness to God, then He can come in with His great love and swallow up what the kingdom of darkness has stolen. And then… Then you can move forward to the other side with a healthy, whole and aligned spirit, soul, heart and body. And that side… That realm… That promised land is overflowing with an increase of LIFE…. Life that is beaming and vibrating with a higher frequency of honor, respect, love and gratitude towards God than you ever imagined possible. And it perpetually echos out, “A promise is a promise!” 🌱 #cultivatelife #winderwomen

 

Spirit · truth

Heaven’s Pace

Last week I told you that God was examining my heart again…

Of course, in the moment I didn’t really understand what the examination was all about. I mean… He does inspect it quite often, but this time… This time felt different. 

So, in true “Amanda form,” I questioned Him about it.

His response, “I’m checking out your capacity. You’ve been asking me for two months to increase your capacity, and I’m ready to do it. So, here I am inspecting the middle ground of your being to make sure it’s prepared to handle the increase of responsibilities I’m sending your way.”

Okay… When I heard this, I was truly excited!

You see over the years I’ve learned that God will not give us more than we contain. Sure, the world’s system has a way of offering us piles of things we aren’t prepared for, but God… God is unique in the fact that He never wants to overwhelm our refinement, development, maturity and growth. Meaning, we can incessantly ask for things, but He’s probably not going to hand them over until we’ve matured into the version of self that He needs us to be.

His process is holy you know?.. It offers us the grace to go at Heaven’s pace. And sure… Sure it takes times to get where we’re going; however, when we do get there, we are able to contain the weight of the responsibilities He’s entrusted us with because we have the capacity to hold it.

And I don’t know if I’m making perfect sense when explaining this; however, I do hope and pray you are inspired to remain focused with where He has you right now. I hope you don’t settle and begin to chase after systems that will ultimately lead to death and destruction of your spirit, soul and heart. Because, I believe, the refinement, development maturity and growth He’s taking you through will provide you with the capacity you need to move forward in every aspect of life. 🌱 #cultivatelife

Confidence · Spirit · truth

Are You Ready for It?

When I write, I try to give the most accurate view of what’s happening in my heart in that given moment. I mean… That is the goal of this blog. To stay as vulnerable as possible with the ups and downs of my life as I follow Father God, Jesus and Holy Spirit’s lead.

So today… Well today my heart as been focused on how grateful I am for 2020.

And I know a lot of people might disagree; however, this year has been a good one because my strength to withstand the waves is found in Him.

You see the past 7 years of my life have felt like a constant and at times violent push from God. He’s single handily walked me up and down mountains and valleys of life and into a place where I can’t rely on anything but Him for everything. Which means my life, my family, my career, my ministry, my finances, my entire world has landed in His hands for protection and provision.

He’s actually allowed the past 7 years to become a place where the waves of life have knocked me down, drug me under and forced me to learn how to get up and stand firm and strong in the face of death, darkness, turmoil, chaos, adversity and division.

And because of this… Because of His training, molding and refinement… Well I’ve been able to truly and heart-fully say, “God is at my right hand. I will not be shaken or fear anything dark that comes into my spiritual realm and dimension of space and time.”

Because you see I believe the shaking and transition that’s happening is good. I believe, beneath all of the politics and opinions, God has a plan to bring repentance, restoration and healing to our broken nation and world. And as people begin to wake up and focus their attention on Him… Not on political parties, disasters that have overtaken us or arguments that divide us… I believe we will begin to truly see a new world that reveals the Kingdom of God and the glory of His Kingdom on this earth.

And so… The question is, “Are you ready for it?!”🌱 #cultivatelife

Spirit · truth

What’s In HIS Heart?

Can I ask a question?… Or more so a series of questions?

In the midst of this great awakening, are we constantly and consistently focused on the heart of God and what He’s doing? Have we set aside isolated time… Time where we can focus on the will of God and what He truly wants as we move forward?

Are we allowing Him to use us based around what He’s saying… Not around what social media is telling us to do and say?

Also… Do we hope to see more truth revealed so that deception and manipulation cannot hide anymore?

Oh! And… what about healing? Do we hope the exposure of evil, wickedness and darkness is followed by a powerful gust of healing and restoration from the Holy Spirit for our country’s soul?

And if so, are we praying His movement is holy and pure… Something that is sanctified and structured in the heart of God where love dwells?

You see I ask all of these questions because they are things I keep asking myself. I need to know if my own heart is turned towards the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit. I need to remind myself that this is about His Kingdom for His glory. I need the God-head to continuously push my heart towards healing and deliverance of sickness, pain and disease of the spirit, soul and body. I need the Holy Spirit to continue to probe around inside of my heart and push me towards the fulness of life through Jesus Christ.

So… Are you focused in on His heart? 🌱#cultivatelife

Spirit · truth

The Unseen System

“Stop watching broken systems fail Amanda. Get your eyes on Me. Keep your eyes on Me and all that I’ve cultivated deep down inside of you. Keep your eyes on My system… On my Kingdom and My glory for in it is pure peace.”

And… Honestly, it’s challenging to stand still while everything is a chaotic mess. It’s challenging to admit there’s nothing I can possibly do but sit still, listen to God, follow what He says and pray accordingly.

But… That’s the truth.

It’s the truth because His system is unseen. It’s happening in and through the spirit because it’s a direct quantum connection between us and God.

And so… If you’re in His Kingdom and you know how to use His system, I want to encourage you to stay focused, rely on it over every other failing system in place… And please, please use your God-given dominion and authority to move forward where ever He is leading your heart🌱👑⚔️ #cultivatelife

Mind · Spirit · truth

Dethronement

I see a throne… It’s high and mighty… But I’m struggling with it’s dethronement. Why? Well because I like the kingdom of lies my imagination has cultivated inside of my head.

Actually, I’ve become so good at creating and buying false images that I sometimes get confused over what’s real and what’s false.

You see when I begin to feel really insecure, afraid or alone, I find myself desperately wanting to block those feelings. So, I use my imagination as a tool to place myself somewhere that makes me feel more comfortable than the present moment does. It’s like a place of refuge and security for me when life seems insecure and unknown. I find it comforting to create an untrue scenario that settles any shame, pain, fear or anxiety I feel. I create, and my reality seems to fade a way for a moment.

There’s a huge let down to telling myself lies though… Nothing I’ve told myself is real, but then I’ve created the story so many times that I begin to believe it’s real. And so my soul is trapped in a web of deception and manipulation.

So how do I get out? How do I become free from the mess I’ve created? Well, its taken time, but the Holy Spirit has revealed so much truth to me. He’s shown me that it’s really unhealthy to use our imaginations to create false worlds. He’s also shown me that I exalt my imagination higher than anything else in my life. But, I don’t see how much I worship and praise my imagination because I don’t see it’s true harm. My lies have blocked me from the truth.

However, the amount of disappointment I keep encountering in my life has kind of become a sign that’s helped me look deeper. It’s kind of caused me to start questioning God about a lot of things that I think and believe. I almost feel like I’m standing in front of a brick wall, but I can’t see the wall because I’ve painted a picture on top of it instead. And the picture is just too beautiful to be false. But then when I try to enter the image, I keep running into a wall of disappointment. I keep feeling hurt, let down and deceived. And so I now know that the wall cannot fall until I admit it’s a wall, not a fanatical image.

But, I do believe, on the other side of this wall is a path that will continue to lead me into the purposes and promises God’s intended for my life. And so, I’ve asked Holy Spirit to continue to help me remove the false images and the wall, one lie at a time. 🌱 #cultivatelife #justlive

Mind · soul · truth

Kingdom of Lies

Lies… Deception… Manipulation… Layers upon layers rest upon my soul. And so my soul feels confused.

But then, my soul doesn’t want a fragment of falseness. My soul wants truth. My heart and spirit crave truth too. But then my mind fears the truth because the lies sound so good and feel so powerful and strong. The lies have been given so much weight and support with my thoughts and my words. I’ve helped cultivate this kingdom of lies.

But the fruit… It isn’t good. The fruit just causes more pain, heartache and disappointment. And even when I try to believe the pain is for a purpose, I find myself more manipulated and deceived than I was before. Constantly pacing in mental hell as I scream, “Why?!!!”

But I hear God. I hear Him clearly when He says, “Why would I lead you down a path of deception and manipulation? Why would I bring pain and confusion to your soul? I want you healthy and whole. So let go.”

And so… I let go. 🌱 #cultivatelife #justlive

Confidence · Spirit · truth

The Crown

Last night I found myself in the midst of deep internal conflict. Why? Well, I was wrestling with God’s will verses my will… this happens frequently.

Well, in the middle of expressing my internal struggle my sister just happened to be watching “The Crown” on Netflix. All of a sudden she said, “Shhhh! Listen to what she (the lead characters grandmother) is saying. I think it will help you.”

So I got quiet and listened. And here’s what she said:

“I have seen three great monarchies brought down through their failure to separate personal indulgences from duty. You must not allow yourself to make similar mistakes. And while you mourn your father, you must also mourn someone else. Elizabeth Mountbatten. For she has now been replaced with another person, Elizabeth Regina. The two Elizabeths will frequently be in conflict with one another. The fact is, the crown must win. It must always win.”

You see after I heard that statement, I just kind of sat back and breathed…. Because I understood, yet again, what I should do.

I believe when we come into the Kingdom of God we are asked to leave our old self at the door and place a crown of royalty upon our head. And because we wear this crown we must represent everything it stands for.

And I’m not going to lie, it’s a challenge to continue to allow the crown to win. Because as we do we let go of more of our selfishness, self-centeredness and human desire to live the life we want verses the life He wants for us.

And I get it, not everyone is going to surrender their entire self to the plans, purposes and desires of God… But I am. And I hope to continue to do it to such a level that others will eventually follow…. That they’ll follow me as I follow God into His Kingdom.

Spirit · truth

Hide-and-Seek

You know those days when you feel like everything’s an uphill climb? You know… the ones that make you feel like you’re never going to reach the destination?

Yeah, that’s how I’ve been for about three days now. And it’s not that it’s a depressing feeling. Because I definitely know what that feels like.. It’s more of a “Come on God! I’m ready! You told me to follow and follow and follow. And so I have. And then you told me to be ready and so I’ve prepared myself. So WHEN… WHEN is everything you’ve been speaking so highly of going to accumulate and come to fruition in my life? Because here I am. Ready and willing to be all you need me to be in the Kingdom.”

Yeah… That’s been me for three days… A constant reverberation to Him and myself about how ready I am.

But then I feel like He’s kind of playing hide-and-seek… Almost like there’s more to be discovered on this journey of being prepared… Almost like there’s a deeper revelation behind what I currently see.

And so I am intrigued. Actually I’m so intrigued that I’m willing to step out into the unknown more than ever before… And I don’t really feel fear or caution anymore. I just feel surrounded by pure peace, strength and love. It’s almost like He’s been calling me to this place for so long… And I thought this place would be a destination, but really it’s just the start of something bold and new and alive.

So… well, i’m fully willing to find Him in the midst of it all. Because I believe in this game of hide-and-seek I’m going to discover the most beautiful, yet authentic version of Jesus ever experienced.

Confidence · Spirit · truth

Just a Prince

Yesterday I was on the train heading uptown to SoHo… My stop, “Prince Street.”

Right before the train came to a stop, a new thought jumped on board… “If Satan is just a prince of this world, then why are we letting him reign over it?”

Immediately my mind started to ponder the reality.

You see I believe when we accept Jesus Christ we are invited into the Kingdom of God to cultivate life… Funny thing, the life around us (or the world) is ruled by an insecure, yet very crafty prince of darkness. But then God asks us to take on our royalty and to reign over this prince.

Because I believe God’s view of us is higher than the view He has of Satan. It’s kind of like the monarchy in England. Harry and William are both princes. Both respect their grandmother. They do not try to overthrow her. And they also realize William will be given the power and authority to reign over the people after his grandmother and father pass away. And then Harry knows and understands, and hopefully respects his brother’s anointing and given authority too. He would never overstep it or overthrow it.

So then my question is, “Why do we allow Satan (who is just a prince) to overstep our God-given power, anointing and authority? Why do we casually sit back and allow him to reign over our lives and decide what rules and reigns in the world? Why have believers in Christ become insecure, pathetic losers who just sit in a corner and cry, when we could just take back what’s rightfully ours?”

As a body of people who are supposed to represent Christ… I believe we are lame. I believe we are trying too hard to be relevant and hip with the culture of Satan when God says, “UMMM, Hello! I called you to stand out and be different and actually make a freaking impact because you have been given the power and authority.”

You see I believe our power, authority and anointing through Christ should actually set us apart. Not the way we dress or the things we have or the messages we preach… But the glory of God we walk in through the Spirit in every moment.

So if you half-way see what I am saying… Then please, wake up and take back your God-given power and authority back right now.